Back when we were newly engaged, I was so excited about our life and our wedding. At the time, I worked hard to surround myself with information, after all, we had never planned a wedding before and I wasn’t quite sure how or what to do.

Surrounding myself with information included making one of the bigger mistakes of my engagement. Excitedly, I went to a local big box book store and purchased two bridal magazines. I promised myself I wouldn’t make it a habit. They were expensive and we were on a college student budget, but I just wanted two, just to see.

Well, as it turns out, buying those two magazines sent me into a fit of tears as I paged through them. The glossy pages were filled with all sorts of things you must do, things you must buy, things you must have, in order for the wedding to even be remotely successful. It talked very little about the love and commitment that we felt were so deeply important, and more about the stuff. I felt woefully inadequate and it took a lot of help from Aaron to set me straight again.

With this pregnancy, I have been trying again to surround myself with information about pregnancy, birth, and, most importantly, child-rearing. I think it is important to know what is happening and know what is going on. For the most part, I have carefully selected resources based on reviews from people that I know and respect. I have chosen books that closely align with our beliefs and opinions about children. For the most part…

Except, a few weeks ago we were at the book store in Nagoya. Going to that bookstore is our only chance to really get our hands on some of the newest magazines and fiction, and I am always drawn to the shiny magazine pages. This past time I zoomed over to the pregnancy section faster than anything and I eyed up the titles. I picked up the latest issue of F”it Pregnancy” and started to take a look.

Right there on the cover of the August issue was a mini-headline for an article inside, “The Mom Job: Is Post-Baby Cosmetic Surgery Right For You?” No sooner did I pick it up, that I set it right back down and walked away from them all. I remembered those tears after paging through the bridal magazines and how inadequate I felt, and I could only imagine the power of this magazine, this article to do the same. The absolute last thing I need right now is to feel bad about my changing shape and form and to have anything that makes this seem like a problem or a hassle that needs to be remedied. I don’t need any extra negativity.

I am loving this pregnancy, we are already loving this baby, and we can’t wait for Little R to come out so that we can meet and find out what a miraculous little person they are.