A few weeks ago a friend of mine asked how I manage to get all this stuff done. There’s been a new design on the blog, blankets are getting finished, sweaters are getting made, posts are getting written. All while we have a new baby and are preparing to leave Japan in a few weeks, what gives?

Well, I don’t really have many secrets, so I’ll fill you in. It’s simple really, you just have to follow my three-part plan.

Step 1: Have a baby. Preferably a very sleepy baby. This will keep you home for most of the day and while the baby is sleeping, either on the bed or in a carrier, you will have ridiculous amounts of time in which to get things done while you are ignoring the hideously large stack of dishes and heaps of laundry.

Step 1.5: Don’t let your baby totally change your life. Yes, the baby is important, but so is the mama and papa. It is important that both mama and papa have lives, interests, and hobbies. Having and keeping those interests alive will not only keep you sane, but they will also help your babe, and eventually, young child realize that they are NOT the center of your universe and that you, too, are a unique, whole person.

Step 2: Have no or very few friends near where you live. Seriously, friends are a huge time suck. Get rid of them, or move far far away, and your time will be freed up to do all those things that your heart desires.

Step 3: Stop waiting for huge swaths of time with which you can pursue your creative endeavors. Instead, take each chunk of time, no matter how small, and do your best to fill it with something you love. Have a spare five minutes? That’s more than enough to work a few rows on a baby sweater. Ten? You can totally get a blog post up in that time. Fifteen? Well, why not draw or read or do something else that requires a bit more time to do it justice. Three hours, while the baby naps? Well, the world is your oyster, but if you have that much time, you should probably at least get the dishes done.

Yes, I am getting a lot done. Yes, I have a lot of time to do various things about the house. Yes, I am feeling really inspired and creative and enjoying the time and freedom that I have to pursue those whims. Yes, sometimes I love this arrangement, it satisfies my inner homebody, but, no, I don’t love it all the time.

Especially the no friends part. The tricky thing about this stay-at-home mom gig, while in Japan, is that all the friends I have/had that speak my language, well they have jobs, regular ones, during the day. So, I could go out during the day, and I have, but let’s face it, it’s just not as much fun going out to lunch or shopping or to visit a temple or even to the grocery store when you’re all by yourself.

Side note – This no friends thing, it is definitely something I am looking forward to remedying when we are back and settled in Chicago. As odd and unnatural as it seems, I have started to formulate a plan on how I can find friends, mom friends, that also don’t work during the day. We will see how it goes.

So, for better or worse, I usually just stay home during the day, until Aaron gets home at night. And, when I am home all day, I have a lot of time, sometimes too much.

So long as I use that time to do good, worthwhile things, I usually feel pretty satisfied. It is when I fall into the trap of doing something useless or unproductive (erm…facebook) during my freetime that I really beat myself up. It’s the days where I have spent a vast majority of my time staring at the computer screen, rather than even blogging or writing myself, that I feel disappointed, unsatisfied, and useless.

So, that is my challenge to myself. To continue trying to fill my freetime with things that either contribute to the family, or to the raising of my son, or at the very least fill me with joy and happiness. If it doesn’t, then it should go.